Sometimes small ideas can make a really big difference. Like figuring out your tendency – a concept recently developed by Gretchen Rubin. It’s truly genius. I figured out that I am a rebel – now it makes sense why accountability DOES NOT work for me and the minute something is “have to” – I just loose my power.
Gretchen grouped people based on how they meet inner and outer expectations. Outer expectation would be something like a work deadline, inner would be a New Year’s resolution. Upholders easily meet inner and outer expectations (the perfect people, but they follow rules), Questioners – easily meet inner expectations, but they minute you need them to do something – OMG – why why why, Obligers – easily meet outer expectations, but struggle with inner (never have time for themselves, accountability works for them!), and Rebels – have a hard meeting inner and outer expectations – act only if it aligns with their inner authentic self, rules are guidelines only. Here’s the test you can take to figure it out.
If you knew your husband/wife or a child was a rebel – you wouldn’t tell them what to do – or you would just be disappointed. They are going to rebel if they “have to” do something. You would give them consequences for specific actions and leave it up to them to decide what to do. See? Simple idea – huge impact. Please read the book and see if you can apply it in your life.